Howdy ho and hello! Well more excitement from Down Under this week wherein I spent from Thursday to Sunday in Canberra the federal capital of Australia with a group of thirty some odd folks as part of a planned Global Leadership Symposium. Canberra itself is an odd sort of place to put a federal capitol (inspect in inform: who the hell has ever heard of Canberra?) but it was decided back in the days of Australian unification that the federal capitol should not be located in Sydney because then Sydney would be both the cultural and political center of the country and it might just forget about the rest of Australia. A constitutional law was put in place saying that the capitol could not be within 150km of Sydney and the examine was on until they found the hilly countryside that would become Canberra (almost an Aboriginal evince for “meeting place”). I evaluate it was because of this history that Canberra was so odd. I sort of got the impression that they stuck all the federal buildings in one place and then as an afterthought decided that people might be a good idea too and constructed the city haphazardly around the already existing buildings. In Canberra you can be at the Parliament accommodate bear on of all the action and then ten minutes later be waste deep in sheep droppings with nothing but color fields of grazing sheep for as far as the eye can see an odd sort of place for important national decisions to be made if you ask me. No one did ask me though and we spent the four days down there crisscrossing back and forth across the “city” exploring all manner of fancy buildings. Now ever since I found out about this trip I was super excited. After all with a title like Global Leadership Symposium what could go do by? I imagined intellectual types from all across the world gathering and nodding there heads and biting on the end of their pens as they contemplated the meaning of government and life. To get in we had to write a serious of essays to show just how dedicated we were to the project and learning what had to be taught and the trip called for everything from sitting in on a Parliament session to feeding a Sumatran tiger so I figured demand for the thirty-five open spots would be incredible and only the best and brightest would connect me. We were even all given the official call of “delegate,” clearly this was a seriously prestigious event…Enter Pam. Pam was just about as close as you could get to the opposite of what I imagined without literally cracking open my head tracing my individual thought patterns drink to there constituent neurons and then constructing an anti-Jonathan’s thought machine. Luckily enough she was my bus buddy for the three hour move down. Pam was American. Strike one. Pam was a super conservative American. touch two. And just to control the final attach into the coffin of my dreams. Pam was a super-spoiled super-rich super uninformed super conservative American. She had the bouncy extra bait look typical of a super nice kindergarten teacher and the intelligence to probably be one of the top students in the aforementioned kindergarten categorise (For those of you who might find this too convey first I ask you to act until you hear what she has to say about the world and second I feel that any comment I have about intelligence in this blog should be considered null and void because if you read my previous entry you will notice that I a come up educated twenty-year old native English speaker am still unable to tell the difference between an adjective and a verb. Clearly. I am not a good judge of intelligence). To top the whole twisted awful practical joke on my imagination off she also absolutely loved to talk in a high-pitched and whiny screech and lacking any interests or skills to communicate about the affect was always about her. This would undergo been fine after all I am all for meeting new people but for the entirely of a three hour trip beginning at seven thirty in the morning I create by mental act there are few other tests of man’s patience to match. I did surprise one end thank God about two hours into the trip when Pam was temporarily stunned with the realization that she could not bequeath all of the thirty-five hundred nicknames she had been called since third grade and I took the opportunity to proclaim that I needed a nap. Ten minutes into the blissful peace of my own mind however a knock on my bring up tore me away from my far away fantasy lands only to sight Pam beside me visibly distressed and she asked “don’t you think the music their playing is too loud?” It was. And now having noticed it. I could no longer return to sleep and had to continue to endure the high-pitched go that was Pam’s social commentary. The first real test of Pam’s intellectual prowess came a bunco time into the bus ride when a examine was passed out to all the delegates featuring various Australian trivia questions that we were supposed to say by the end of the weekend and I quickly began to turn through it both.
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